Years ago,I fall in love with a girl.But at that time,I’m a bit goofball and crazy.I’m also a bit immature on judging mine and her feelings at that time.Love at such stage can crumble because there is nothing serious behind it.However,as times passed,somehow along the way,I fall in love once again.This time however the stake is higher.Somehow,it’s a bit difficult for me to express my feelings to her.First of all,I still traumatized with that painful memory.Yeah,for that particular distant memory,it’s nothing and yet,it somehow scarred me a bit.Secondly,I’m a bit poor when it comes to girls.While with them,I’m being rough,at times goofball,crazy and emotional.There are times when I humiliate myself,I wish those memories can be erased from my mind because I could not bear such humiliation.How am I supposed to come clean to her about my feelings if I continuously haunted with such painful memories like that?Next,love is something new,even to me.I never dated anyone throughout my life.Well,some may question this detail but this is the inconvenient truth.I once tried dating services but I’m not sure whether is it a bad idea or not.Due to those memories and lack of experience while facing girls,this is a huge problem.Because of that,I’m frozen and speechless,I could not speak such word to anyone.Last but not least,rejection.I feared rejection not only it will ruined our friendship but at the same time,it will jeopardize my feelings as well.For years,my feelings have been toyed mercilessly.Although some may say it’s just part another joke and banter,I can still feel the pain even though those words are uttered years ago.I feel humiliated,downgraded and heart broken.The last thing I need is another splinter in my soul.Of course,rejection is part of life but it still hurts.I want to tell her how I felt.I don’t care if she rejected me but how am I suppose to be honest with her?Superficially,our world are worlds apart.The more distressing question is that will everything will be the same?Will our friendship last even after this revelation?All these questions really forced me to the edge.I do not want to be entangled in this particular web.I do love her but is this the cost I have to bear?